Posts
Quarrel with my Dad again..
Because of me..
Again..
I think..
Cause i went out & came back home late..
But..
At first did he think of the cause?
He asked me alotz of questions..
That i don't wanna answer..
Because i know..
If i answer it sincerely..
The situation will become even worst..
He asked me..
Why wanna make this year's CNY so unhappy?
Like i wanted to be like this?
I also wanted a happy CNY..
A complete family reunion..
He asked me..
Why i always hang-out with my friends..
Because i want someone to accompany me..
I'm stuck in here all alone..
What can i do is just 24hours facing the computer..
He always said that i did'nt think of what he feel...
Does he think what i'm feeling?
Me..
As the only son..
In a broken family..
Does he think of what i'm experiencing all this while?
He asked me..
Am i really hate him?
I ignored it..
But..
Deep in my heart..
I did not hate him..
He's my Dad..
Why should I hate him?
Is he who give me life..
Is he take care of me when i'm sick..
He done lotz already
I just hate myself..
I hate my life..
Since small..
I'd been like a ball..
Being kicked here & there..
Don't have a proper family..
No people tell me how to walk the life..
I was blindly walk the life alone for years..
Walked many wrong road..
Did lotz mistakes..
Learned lotz from the mistakes..
It's just i don't have the chance to use what i have learned..
All I wanted is just a proper family..
Why I cant get it?
I need someone to support me..
To do what i wanted to do for life..
To help me when i'm in trouble..
But..
When i think of my future..
What i planned..
Always get rejected..
Nobody will support me..
~LIFELESS~
Why i always wanted to be drunk?
Not i like the taste of beer..
Is i like the feel of drunk..
When i'm drunk..
My brain will stop thinking the past..
The unhappy things..
The torture..
The memories that annoying me..
Maybe i'm thinking too much..
I have to stop it..
But..
When i'm all alone again..
I will automatically start thinking..
Repeat & repeat & repeat~
Non-stop..
So
That's why i hate to be alone..
I wish i could find a chance..
To express all my true feeling out..
Peacefully
Solve all the maze in my brain..
Without worries anything bad will happens..
You know..
Sometimes we cant solve problems if u cant control your temper..
Shout & loud does'nt mean you are right..
You are just IGNORING the truth..
If you listen to people's..
People will listen to your's too..
Simple thing..
Don't tell me you don't know huh?
This is one of the problems im facing now..
I still have many things stuck in my brain..
I dont's know how to express it out..
I know what will happen if i say it out..
Something bad will happen..
So
I choose to keep it for myself..
Message to lifeless kids:
Dont be like me..
Wasting the time..
Wasting the life..
Ruin your own life
If you have a good one..
Appreciate it..
Once you choosed the wrong way..
There is no turning back..
You have to continue facing it..
I tell you..
It's tough..
Lot tougher than you can imagine..
Don't be NAIVE~
In this world..
Only your family will stand behind you..
Supporting you..
Friends can betray you anytime..
But family..
Will still by your side..
Even you betrayed them..
=FML=
Because of me..
Again..
I think..
Cause i went out & came back home late..
But..
At first did he think of the cause?
He asked me alotz of questions..
That i don't wanna answer..
Because i know..
If i answer it sincerely..
The situation will become even worst..
He asked me..
Why wanna make this year's CNY so unhappy?
Like i wanted to be like this?
I also wanted a happy CNY..
A complete family reunion..
He asked me..
Why i always hang-out with my friends..
Because i want someone to accompany me..
I'm stuck in here all alone..
What can i do is just 24hours facing the computer..
He always said that i did'nt think of what he feel...
Does he think what i'm feeling?
Me..
As the only son..
In a broken family..
Does he think of what i'm experiencing all this while?
He asked me..
Am i really hate him?
I ignored it..
But..
Deep in my heart..
I did not hate him..
He's my Dad..
Why should I hate him?
Is he who give me life..
Is he take care of me when i'm sick..
He done lotz already
I just hate myself..
I hate my life..
Since small..
I'd been like a ball..
Being kicked here & there..
Don't have a proper family..
No people tell me how to walk the life..
I was blindly walk the life alone for years..
Walked many wrong road..
Did lotz mistakes..
Learned lotz from the mistakes..
It's just i don't have the chance to use what i have learned..
All I wanted is just a proper family..
Why I cant get it?
I need someone to support me..
To do what i wanted to do for life..
To help me when i'm in trouble..
But..
When i think of my future..
What i planned..
Always get rejected..
Nobody will support me..
~LIFELESS~
Why i always wanted to be drunk?
Not i like the taste of beer..
Is i like the feel of drunk..
When i'm drunk..
My brain will stop thinking the past..
The unhappy things..
The torture..
The memories that annoying me..
Maybe i'm thinking too much..
I have to stop it..
But..
When i'm all alone again..
I will automatically start thinking..
Repeat & repeat & repeat~
Non-stop..
So
That's why i hate to be alone..
I wish i could find a chance..
To express all my true feeling out..
Peacefully
Solve all the maze in my brain..
Without worries anything bad will happens..
You know..
Sometimes we cant solve problems if u cant control your temper..
Shout & loud does'nt mean you are right..
You are just IGNORING the truth..
If you listen to people's..
People will listen to your's too..
Simple thing..
Don't tell me you don't know huh?
This is one of the problems im facing now..
I still have many things stuck in my brain..
I dont's know how to express it out..
I know what will happen if i say it out..
Something bad will happen..
So
I choose to keep it for myself..
Message to lifeless kids:
Dont be like me..
Wasting the time..
Wasting the life..
Ruin your own life
If you have a good one..
Appreciate it..
Once you choosed the wrong way..
There is no turning back..
You have to continue facing it..
I tell you..
It's tough..
Lot tougher than you can imagine..
Don't be NAIVE~
In this world..
Only your family will stand behind you..
Supporting you..
Friends can betray you anytime..
But family..
Will still by your side..
Even you betrayed them..
=FML=
with ur leg in such a condition,u r going out ev nite til 4am something n nt only once i had aDVICED u nt to cont like dat n DID U LISTEN at all? u jz promising me with empty words over n over again.doesnt dat makes a person could totally losing patient?did u ever heed my advices?do u rmb d day u took dat accident?did u listen to me nt to go out AGAIN?n arent u supposed to REST in home due to ur wound?jz aft a few days bck frm hospt doing cementing,it crack due to over walking.....n hw to understand u all these years when u jz keep quiet abt ur feeling n seldom make conversation with ur family? u jz spend n waste ur time doing lepak. do u really wana spent time with ur family?u said u came frm a broken family n i really feels sorry to u. bt y instead of sealing cracks 2gether,y stil wana make it deeper by depressing urself in a corner? u said it in ur own words "a family is stil a family" LIFE HAVE NO TURNING BACK,IT ONLY HAVE TURNING POINT.
ReplyDelete*POSTED BY UR DAD*
ReplyDeleteu 2 dont so gek dong, find one day to have a heart to heart talk ok? things wont be ok if u 2 dont talk them out. sometimes youngster try to hide everything cos they don know how to express their feelings and lead to stressing adults out. nam i knw u r feeling boring at home but as parent's view they want the best for you even they cant give us all. yee goh also heart pain one see u sit at home and emo over much things that you cant do now after the accident. example, if ur leg touch wood kena again, who pain? u r the one who is suffering leh, but at the same time we also heart pain cos we cant do anything to help u reduce the pain but at least ease ur pain or to prevent it. i understand your feelings, you r feeling lonely, i understand ok :) i experienced it before and i wasnt even good either, when we have time we talk when we face to face ok? i was once rebel until i found my own way of turning my life and now im heading the right way (at least i think i am) i heartache ah see u all like this :s i understand the feelings of 2 of u... i understand how youngster think and as a parent's view too :X dont scold me from commenting x.x
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